This Morning

I was just processing this morning's prayer time and discussion and writing out the substance and what the Lord was saying to me in it all...and I just thought maybe you guys would benefit and enjoy the sharing of it.

This morning our prayer time turned into a powerful exposition on the lack and the necessity for the eyes of our hearts to be enlightened to the glorious riches that is His inheritance in the saints - - which is to say, what bounty there is in the elementary teachings of the gospel that we have overlooked in order to bite into "meatier" things which our bodies have not the matured ability to digest and distribute as sustenance to our spirits. We have become cynical, lackluster people who can not love eachother nor enjoy the grace offered to us because we have not adequately appropriated or even seen the reality of redemption, justification, sanctification or even the efficacy of the Blood. It was said that the result of overlooking the gospel is death and decay in our inner man.

*Here are bits and pieces that I took as notes as several of the saints had input:

- God is the prism through which we must see eachother.

-Hardness, vindictiveness and cynicism are the cruel outcomes of disappointed illusions - an idealism which is itself a deceptive form of humanism.

- The death of every fellowship and relationship is the ideal (seed of destruction) that we each bring into it.

- When you look at the underside of an embroidery, it is a jungle of thread, a tangled mess - but viewed from above, it is a masterpiece. It is all contingent on our "seeing".

-Death is always the wage of sin - even for believers to have no delight in prayer, scripture, or fellowship is a form of death - we need to receive His Life afresh in the place we have been subdued. To keep our heart requires ALL diligence, for from it flows all issues of life.

- If our work is done from the Rest of God, we can never experience "burn-out". He is our vigor and vitality - in Him there is no decay or loss.

-Nothing justifies being downcast - God has made every provision for life, so every bit of death is reprehensible - YET as for us, we must lift the downcast and strengthen feeble knees - it is doubtful that any are unaware of their faltering - they do not need condemnation, but a timely word for their flagging souls.

- Death diminishes one's ability to see any benefit in God

- We must always carry a contrition within because we know from what pit we have been dug and could easily fall in again but for His grace that keeps us. This affects our very tone with one another and the way we go about in our correction.

Thanks for sharing in this with me guys - love you and miss you!

Those Crazy Hutters...

Again, not much to talk about in "blog-form". I have just been spending most of my time being surrounded by Hutterites. Yesterday I talked for a long time with Jonie (Jerome's wife...some will remember them)- it's amazing how different our circumstances and conflictions with the world and yet how much the same. We both desire to leave the thing that has controlled our mode of being so long (our respective cultures) - but it is all the old story of the world...only in different forms. In there lies our predicament...but we are not to leave it and separate ourselves outwardly. The separation must come from within. When Christ sets us free we are free indeed and we need not fear any man or system's influence. I have really been amazed by the love and acceptance of these Hutterite folk...I know that they were brought up to consider us as "outsiders" - they were taught that they are the only saved ones because the rest are so worldly - - and yet they do not reject me because they disagree with my pants...they actually try to understand why I find them to be modest. Many times we just throw back our heads and laugh because of how crazy we think eachother are. But I tell you I love those crazy "plain clothed" people. They have taught me much. I have yet to see better mothers and wives than they. And you will not hear them talk of anything pertaining to God in any mechanical way...it is always with such tenderness and affection for the person of Jesus and the astonishment of so great a salvation. Their prayers are always marked with the sentiment of "Why Lord, did you see fit to save wretched me?". Anyway...just thoughts of the day.

I'm going to scream....

**sigh**

The Death of Guest...(as we knew him)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Christopher_Guest

"In April 2005, he announced he would not be making anymore of his "mockumentaries" because he didn't find them funny anymore."

We must comfort one another...for this is indeed a sad day for us all.

Other Thoughts

You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you because he trusts in You. Trust in the LORD forever, for the LORD GOD is an everlasting rock - Isaiah 26:3,4

In the path of Your judgements, O LORD we wait for you; Your name and remembrance are the desire of our soul. My soul yearns for You in the night; my spirit within me earnestly seeks You. For when Your judgments are in the earth, the inhabitants of the world learn righteousness.
vs. 8,9

O LORD You will ordain peace for us; You have done for us all our works. v. 12

For thus said the LORD GOD, the Holy One of Israel. In returning and rest you shall be saved; in quietness and in trust shall be your strength. 30:15


"Strive to Enter in at the Straight Gate" (Oswald Chambers Journal)

"Cut it off." My heart is bleeding,
And my spirit's wrung with pain.
Yet I hear my Jesus pleading,
"Cut it off or all is vain."

So I've stopped my ears in terror
Lest self pity make me quail,
Lest at last I take the error
And God's purpose thwart and fail.

I am bowed to death in sadness,
For the pain is all too great,
But the dear Lord must find pleasure
In the way He maketh straight.


Taken from discussion in a morning's prayer meeting after praying for Nathan and others whom the Lord has placed in a vice of sorts.

The Lord allows a saint to remain in the strain of a situation or a circumstance from which one would desparately seek relief and release - for when at last His deliverance comes, it will be at the time when it will do the greatest injury to our Enemy and bring the greatest glory to His Name. Are we willing to remain and not seek release but rather ask Him to strengthen our backs and knees to bear up under it all? May God turn a deaf ear to all our whimpering and self-pity that His Name be made great. He knows how long to hold us in the fire - not so long that we would be destroyed, and not too short that we remain with impurities. We learn obedience through the things we suffer.

Thoughts on Love

God places such an absolute premium on Love that our overlooking of it must be regarded as fatal to the very life we have set our hopes on attaining to. We would much prefer to believe that our knowledge and zeal for deeper truths of the faith purify our souls and make us unfathomably spiritual - however, time and time again if we would only listen, the scriptures as well as life experience would have us corrected. The whole of the world's church both near and abroad has been divided against itself - becoming weak and powerless against sin and the world system. We have stacks of books to show what we know - and yet what has it every profited without love? We love to expose one another and reveal to all what penetrating spiritual insights we have into the human psyche - and for all our "spirituality" we have slandered our weak brother, stripped him and publicly exibited his nakedness (and had we eyes to see, our own as well). One slight difference in docterine causes within us enough suspicion assume every scandelous thing. But then it appears - this new command of Christ that we LOVE one another - not as the sinners do, who can naturally love in pleasant conditions. No, Christ demands the impossible. He taxes our human will and charity to the uttermost limit and we find we have not the means to pay up to such a requirement. Yet if we can not love our brothers who are born again by the same Spirit into the same Life, what hope is there for this world? He has made a provision in His own broken bleeding body that puchased for us a common newness of Life - that by Faith we may draw upon His inexhaustible resource of love, humility, patience, forebearance...holiness! - so as to never come up short. However, so long as we see only flesh and not Christ in eachother(Paul says, "I see no man") and likewise look to our own flesh to foot the bill - we will utterly fail. May we cry our for mercy on our hateful, slanderous souls that we may be one as They are one! And may we be intimately acquainted with that Love that covers rather than exposes a multitude of sins - to outdo one another in showing honor.

Col. 3:12-17

Minnesota...again

Those of you who were with my last summer here at BI will understand how I am about to explain myself. This place is so hard. Nothing has "happened"...but I realized my wounds have not closed up 100%. I am so glad to see (almost) everone and (almost) everyone has been very glad to see us. My room is now in the basement (no longer 209 : ( and well...i just HATE spiders. I hate mosquitos too...they have bitten me in strange places that I can't scratch in public. So Jed and I are going to be completely alone in the lodge for the next month after this one family leaves on Saturday. Jed has been able to pick up a few days welding in the shop - which is a two sided gift - Jed gets money and I get solitude that I have long been needing. Right now I don't feel well - sick at my tummy and a TERRIBLE headache. It may not actually be that terrible, but I never have headaches, so I think it's awful. It doesn't help that it is oddly very hot and humid here.

On the other hand - apart from all that complaining - - - man God is good to me. Being alone has been healing to my bones. It was very necessary that I have this time to really seek the Lord about my future - nothing has been revealed, but my time with God has still be sweet and He has made me more diligent these past couple months and hungry for His Word. You guys know how invigorating it is to your spirit when you literally crave the Bible and you read voraciously with understanding and concentration. I read two biographies in the past 2 weeks: Oswald Chambers - Abandoned to God & The Heavenly Man. I was so uplifted and "encouraged" is too weak of a word to use- - I HIGHLY suggest you read them. The Chambers bio is not well written as such - however the journal excerpts are incredible. You will be surprised at how similar we are too him in our spiritual walk. The other is about a Chinese man during the persecution of the underground church in China...so humble and sincere and full of simple wisdom.

Okay...I have talked too much. I must get going. Love you guys - I pray for each one of you. May the Lord keep us in Him united by one Spirit.